Why Your Husband Will Never Be Your Soulmate...

I think my whole body shook. My eyes went wild and I wanted to give him all the love a woman could give a man.

He had called me his "soulmate."

It's what every girl wants to hear and sadly believes in. It has been two years since that lovely day and I'm still the love of his life, but no longer do we call each other "soulmates." 

Why? Is it because the hot flaming lust is gone? Absolutely not! As a matter of fact, I have grown to love this man more deeply and tenderly over the years. We no longer say "soulmates" for the simple fact that I no longer believe in such a thing.

I find it quite silly to think that out of billions of people in the world you are to believe there is only one person for you! I guess it was more of a magical fantasy to believe at a young age. As a little girl, all the princess stories are about a prince coming to rescue you, and everything was perfect after that.

I was a girl when I believed in it. I am now a woman and a mother, and I want to teach my daughter something my mother never taught me: No one in the world can make you happy.

They can indeed bring you happiness but they can't make you happy. Only you can fill that emptiness, and only you can manifest fulfillment. I know we hear that on a daily basis, but few women actually take it upon themselves to practice this self-loving act.

Self-love is a process and a transformation. It's a beautiful journey called "life." As time passes by, and you really start to learn to practice self-love, life becomes so much simpler. I'm learning that my happiness can only come from the hard work I put in to reach a goal.

Think about it, there is no one else that can accomplish your goals, only you can do such a thing. No one can put in the work for you to accomplish anything, and you can't accomplish anything without putting in the work. The day you put all your effort and heart on someone else's actions to make you happy is the day you will find yourself with a heavy heart of disappointment. Then off you go again on the road to finding your next "soulmate."

Your love partner is there to make you happier. It's this key word - "happier" - instead of "happy," that will absolutely change your life into a much more fulfilling one.

My partner is an extraordinary man full of talents and sexiness, of course! I fell in love the second I met him, and I haven't looked at another man the same since. But, if for some reason I had not met my Mr. Right, would I still be as happy as I am today?

To the faithful believers of soulmate-ism, (yes i just made that word up) the answer would be no. I would be lost and doomed, roaming around and waiting for my soulmate to fill this emptiness.

The reality is that if I would have never met him, I would have been the same happy Anna he first met. So would he! He's a positive, happy person who sets his own goals and reaches them. He fulfills his happiness on things he does on his own.

It's good to date and have a longterm relationship with someone who is happy all by themselves. People who base their happiness on others live on the verge of anxiety. They tend to be insecure, needy, clingy, and overly-jealous. Who the heck wants to be around someone like that? They go from person to person, or even worse, stay in a horribly destructive relationships for years, and live a life full of regrets and depression.

Love is a beautiful experience, it's what keeps this world spinning and evolving. That love should always start within yourself. Learn about yourself, really try to figure out what your talents and passions are. The journey of finding yourself, and learning to put in the effort to grow, is the journey of self-love. It's the journey to a happy you.

No matter who walks into your life, deep down you know you are happy with or without them. You nourish your happiness by the constant quest to keep growing. So, let's save the soulmate silliness to all the chick flick movies we drag our men to watch on date night. Remember to never put down the books on self-growth and never stop your drive to have all of your wildest dreams come true!

twitter: @funisizechiri